Listen. I might be crazy or some kinda ass hole (actually both), but I can’t stand it when people wanna trade food. You know, you’re out to dinner with friends or family or a stranger you meet smoking crack in an ally, whatever. The food you have been pining for has arrived! It is a masterpiece. The sight the smell, you grab the appropriate utensils, and finally you sink your teeth into it. Amazing! But. Just before you can enjoy the next savory bite of that delectable cuisine, you hear a voice say “hey can I try that?”–Now, if you’re like most people you reluctantly agree, and in turn are offered a taste of whatever beat ass dish the crack head ordered. No more people! I have begun, albeit under much criticism, to end this heinous trend. No food trading! I requested the meal on my plate for a reason! And, be very wary my friends, of those who start the charade with “this is great, would you like to try?”–No! I chose not to share! Look, it’s not personal. I just don’t want your food messin with my food, I dunno, I just don’t like that. Like I said, I’m a crazy asshole…..Song of the day, Faith No More, The Gentle art of Making Enemies.
no thank you.